Work-life balance is all the rage these days. Unfortunately, it seems that most of what we have been told is a lie. Here are 10 myths regarding work-life balance that are stressing you out. My checklist is a living document, that I am constantly updating. That’s really it! It’s a crazy easy concept, but an absolute necessity for anyone trying to balance motherhood and working on your business. A to-do list keeps your mind and your life organized, so you don’t have to spend precious time trying to remember everything you have. I’ve learned that YES, it is completely possible to run your own business and be a happy, healthy mom. In this post, I want to take a moment to reflect and appreciate all of the amazing lessons I’ve learned on this journey of being a mompreneur. Here’s what I’ve learned so far to balance motherhood and running a business.
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Are you a mom and feel like you can never get any work done for your business?
Do you often feel guilty when you spend extra time on your business instead of with your children?
How can you let these precious moments with your children go on the back burner occasionally so you have make your dreams come true?
Balancing the titles between a Mom and a Business Owner can be extremely difficult.
I've got 5 tips that might be able to cure that guilt and allow you to have a healthier balanced scale between your titles.
And I mean it.
This comes first.
You can’t do anything without it.
Here it is:
Let goof the guilt.
All of it.
You feel guilty for neglectingyour biz.
Guilty for neglecting your mama duties.
It’s a common feeling – it creeps up into your heart and says that you aren’t doing enough.
That YOU aren’t enough.
It’s not true.
You CAN be a successful creative business woman AND a lovely mom.
But you’ve got to stop feeling guilty about everything.
Once you’ve checked step one off your list, the following steps will help you to combat guilt by prioritizing what’s important and focusing on your goals.
Scheduleeach hour, then roll with the punches.
Isn’t being organized and flexible a contradiction?
At first glance, yes.
But knowing how to balance organization and flexibility helps you to keep the wide-angle lens on life.
Rather than thinking of organization and flexibility as opposites, think of them as two different steps in the Mom and Biz dance.
If you don’t schedule your time, you won’t know which time slot you’re borrowing from when you need to be flexible.
We homeschool so your day might look different mine.
But I’ll share my schedule to give you a framework.
Biz-life: 8 am – 10 am
The kids get up, eat breakfast, work on chores and can play.
I’m on my computer checking emails, posting on social media, writing patterns.
Anything I need to do on my screens gets done here.
I keep the kids on track with reminders, but I’m drinking coffee and working.
Mom-life: 10 am – 12 pm
School together at the table.
This means worksheets, memory work, reading time.
Mom-life: 12 pm – 3 pm
After lunch, we head outdoors for what we call “adventure school”.
We observe nature, collect leaves, sketch nature scenes, go for a walk.
I like to save big, messy art activities for days when the weather is inclement.
Biz-life: 3 pm – 5 pm
The kids enjoy some quiet time.
They can read, play separately (to give them a break from their siblings) and T.V. is allowed at the end of quiet time.
I spend more time on the computer, but if I’m teaching a crochet class that day, I dedicate this slot to preparing for that.
I need to gather supplies and print off patterns.
Sometimes I crochet during this time (with tea nearby and Gilmore Girls on the screen).
Mom-life: 5 pm – 7 pm
Dinner time and family time.
We play games after dinner or have a movie night.
Something together.
Biz-life: 8 pm
Kids are tucked in bed.
This slot isn’t strictly biz-time, but my husband and I watch one of our favorite shows while I crochet.
That’s our schedule in a nutshell!
This month I had a huge deadline.
Huge.
Like, hunker-down-and-eat-meals-out-of-the-freezer-and-get-it-done-NOW kind of deadline.
So, what did I do when I had to work for two days straight on my biz?
I borrowed time from my mom-life for my biz-life.
Since we do school year-round and don’t take breaks when public school is off, we can afford a few days off when it’s needed.
I like that kind of flexibility in my life.
When the deadline had passed, I owed my mom-life a few slots of time.
Instead of working in the morning, I sat in my chair in the living room and was totally present with my kids.
Instead of working for the afternoon, we went to the library or grabbed hot chocolates at the local book store.
Instead of crocheting while watching a show, my husband and I opened a bottle of wine, snuggled on the couch, and watched a movie we’ve been wanting to see.
Can you see how I borrow time?
I slipped out the biz-life and replaced it with mom-life for a few days.
And you know what?
After that huge deadline, paying back time to my family was a much-needed respite!
Flip the situation: you all have influenza for a week.
There’s not going to be a lot of time for your biz.
Don’t stress.
Payit back when everyone is healthy.
Think about your own life situation and how you can make a similar schedule.
Don’t do it.
Ron Swanson (the memorable boss from Parks and Recreation) said it well, “Don’t half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.”
You aren’t doing your kid or your biz any favors when you scroll through your Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest feeds while attempting to parent.
Noresponding to emails.
No packaging orders.
The reverse gets tricky.
I can’t totally condone saying, “ignore your kid while you work from home. If he’s bleeding – too bad for him, it’s biz-life time!”
BUT, you should schedule time once a week where you work on your biz sans children.
And I MEAN sans children.
For at least 3 hours a week you should not be in the same building as your child(ren). (Moms with newborns get an exemption here, okay? I’m not an ogre!)
Find a sitter.
Don’t have money?
Find a friend who wants to tradebabysitting.
Or ask Nana.
Or swap with your husband.
For the sake of your sanity and your biz – do it.
I started having a “night-off” once a week and I wish I’d been doing it since I became a mother.
One night where I don’t have to figure out dinner and wrangle kids to bed.
One night where I can work on my biz, go out with a friend, whatever!
My husband and I agreed on an evening and he stays home with the kids. (This also means I encourage him to go hang out with his friends for an evening!)
Besides this night off:
1. Schedule times you can be 100% mom: no screens, no working on your biz, be totally present with your kid(s).
2. Schedule times you can be 100% focused on your biz-life: don’t feel guilty that your kid is totally content playing on the floor without you, napping, eating cheerios in the high chair, and (dare I say it) watching a show or movie.
Stop gasping.
If your kids watch any amount of television, then use it in the most productive way possible!
Work on your biz.
It’s 100% biz-life time!
I’ve found that when I limit the amount of time the television is on, my kids will sit and watch a show for an hour without bothering me.
But if I keep it on all the time, they are only half-interested and I can only half-focus on my biz.
I only let them watch television at the end of quiet time.
For the most part, they are good about playing and reading quietly (and separately) until that time.
And when I’ve given my kids slots of time where they get 100% of me (remember, no mixing!), then they are more content when I need to focus on something else.
Are you expecting a child?
Planning a vacation?
Are you hosting visitors from out of town?
Figure this into your big picture schedule.
Make sure to extend your turnaround time to accommodate these events.
Like Mei says, “Under promise, over deliver”.
Give yourself maternity (or adoption) leave.
Take the time you think you need and double it.
If you have an online shop, each listing should say, “Check our shop announcement for current turnaround time.”
That way, you can have a designated announcement spot and don’t have to change each listing each time when you need to adjust for big life events.
This is more important when you are in the season of life when you are adding children to your family!
I opened my Etsy shop when I was very pregnant with my first-born.
My hats were selling like crazy on Etsy and craft fairs.
I made sure to communicate with my customers and keep my turnaround timemanageable.
Moms, take heart.
You’ve got this.
Let go of the guilt.
Scheduleyour days.
Keep the boundaries.
Be flexible.
Plan ahead.
You can be beautifully successful in BOTH lives: mom-life and biz-life.
Abbey Swanson is mama to three little ones and an unashamed yarnophile who is passionate about every aspect of the process, from dying and spinning her own yarn to designing and crocheting her own patterns.
You can see more of her work at The Firefly Hook where you can find whimsical essays, free patterns and practical tips as well as updates on her current projects and classes.
is all the rage these days. Unfortunately, it seems that most of what we have been told is a lie.
Here are 10 myths regarding work-life balance that are stressing you out and setting you up for failure.
1. It’s actually about achieving balance.
This is the biggest misconception regarding work-life balance. The hard truth is that balance doesn’t exist. It would be great if it did but our lives don’t exist in silos.
No matter how hard you try, there will be times when work bleeds into your and vice versa. Just because you clock out for the day doesn’t mean that you’re 100 percent free from work. You may still have to respond to an email or review your schedule. As an entrepreneur, you’re always thinking about work in some capacity.
If balance doesn’t exist, then what’s the solution? For Meeta Vengapally, founder and CEO of Garnysh, it’s integration. The integration is needed because “it’s about not separating the compartments of your life, but rather thinking of them in terms of the whole.” For example, when you’re at your child’s game, you can have a quick business call. If you have to run errands for work, ask for a friend who wants to tag along.
Another option is to take the approach. “I think work-life harmony is a good framework,” Bezos told Thrive Global. “I prefer the word ‘harmony’ to the word ‘balance’ because balance tends to imply a strict tradeoff.”
If you’re happy outside of work, then you’ll be more productive and energized in the workplace. And, if you’re fulfilled with your work, then you’re more content at home.
Related: The First Step to Achieving Work-Life Balance? Stop Calling It That
2. Life needs to be compartmentalized.
Another myth is that we need to compartmentalize life. For some of us, that means an even 50-50 split where we spend half of our at work and the other at home. For others, it’s dividing our days into 8-8-8 hour blocks. This longstanding mentality is that we should spend eight hours at work, sleep for another eight, and set aside eight hours for leisure and social activities.
The thing is that it’s not possible to evenly divide your time like this. There will be days when you put in 10 hours of work. The tradeoff is that there will be others when you only work for a couple of hours.
Instead of forcing yourself to compartmentalize your life, devote the right amount of time on your current priorities. If you’re approaching a deadline, then you may need to put in long hours working. You may miss out on with your family and friends at the moment. However, when you meet that deadline and celebrate with a vacation, then that’s when you make up that quality time.
3. You can have it all.
How I Balance Motherhood With Running My Own Business Name
Even if you have created a schedule that allows you to exercise, spend time with your inner circle and get all of your work done, you’re still making a sacrifice somewhere. If I want to help my business grow, then I will have to travel frequently. Whether it is to check in on my remote team or speaking at a conference, I will be out of town and unable to spend that time with my family.
As Evernote CEO Chris O’Neill told the New York Times, “The truth is that it’s not easy balancing work with family. I travel a bunch. I don’t get home in time for dinner on a regular basis. Saturday is the thing that’s closest to sacrosanct.”
Don’t fall for the trap that you can have it all or doing everything that you want. Sometimes you have to give certain things up while pursuing your goals and dreams. The sooner you realize this, the faster you’ll be able to cut the unnecessary out from your life until you’ve reached your goal.
4. Time management is the answer.
I’m all for time management. At the same time, it’s an outdated concept. Most of the time management techniques we put on a pedestal were created before we were connected 24/7.
I wish I could completely unplug to free me of distractions or unwind. The reality is that as a business owner, I can’t go completely off the grid. To counter this, you have to be selective with how you spend your time. That means spending your energy on the right actions at the right time.
5. Technology will give you more free time.
has definitely made life much more comfortable. However, it’s not guaranteed to add more hours to your day magically. For example, you can use chatbots to handle necessary customer service inquiries. Artificial intelligence can give you smart suggestions on how to schedule a meeting. But, you still need to interact with customers personally and plan your own productive meeting.
In other words, technology is an assist. But, it’s not going to do everything for literally. You still need to put in a little effort.
6. It’s what employees care about most.
While employees enjoy flexibility, it’s not always at the top of their list. For most of them, they want meaningful work. Additionally, they crave recognition and want to work for an empathetic .
Again, balance is essential for your team. But, making sure that your team knows how they fit into the larger picture, acknowledged for their hard work and understanding their needs trumps balance.
Related: What Employees Really Want (No, it's Not About Money)
7. The early bird catches the worm.
I wake up at 5:15 am. A lot of successful people do. The idea is that if you’re up bright and early, you have more time to get things done. As a result, you’ll have more time to enjoy the fruits of your labor.
But that doesn’t work for everyone. Some people are more productive at night. Also, whether you realize it or not, you’re adding more work hours to your day. That’s not terrible when there’s a deadline or a fire to put out. But, that’s not good for the long-term cause you’re going to burn yourself out.
The key is to work around your productivity peaks. So, if you’re more alert and focused around 10 a.m., then it may not be beneficial to set your alarm at 4 a.m.
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8. You never have to work during off-hours.
Perhaps the leading argument for work-life balance is that you never have to work during “off-hours.” Entrepreneurs don’t always have that luxury. Sometimes we do have to be tapped into our business while on vacation or having downtime with the family. And, some of us enjoy what we do so much that work can’t be turned off just because we’re not at the office.
Having a fulfilled life, then, doesn’t mean always sticking to strict boundaries. If you’re in the zone and want to work, go ahead. And, when there’s nothing you would rather do than play board games with your family, then don’t feel guilty about tuning out work during that moment.
9. The less you work, the happier you’ll be.
Just because you’re able to crank out all of your work in 20 hours doesn’t mean that you’ll be happy. I know plenty of people you don’t put in excessive Elon Musk hours who are miserable. And, some folks don’t mind putting in 40 plus hours a week.
In other words, it's not about how many hours you work or do something you love. It’s about the quality of how you’re spending your time.
Related: 20 Secrets to Living a Happier Life
How I Balance Motherhood With Running My Own Business Plan
10. Everything has to be scheduled.
Essential tasks and appointments always go into my calendar. But, that doesn’t mean you have to schedule your entire life literally. It’s unrealistic and adds more stress to you’re already hectic life. And, it’s been found that people are happier when leisure activities happen spontaneously.
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So while you should use your calendar to keep your life organized, don’t overdo it. Leave blank spaces so that you can grab coffee with a friend or sit back and process your day.